Suprise Me

The Great Knaidel Disaster As you may know a bowl of chicken soup without knaidelach is like a day without sunshine. For the uninitiated let me explain that knaidelach is the German-derived Yiddish word for matzo balls,  and knaidel the singular.   And as I’ve said,  without knaidelach chicken soup is just, well,  soup.  (See The Matzo Ball Spelling Bee)… Read More

difference between charm and charisma. Read More

The schout whereupon demanded that the defendant "shall be punished as a tumultuous and seditious person . . . " Read More

I have been told that I have the soul of a Borscht Belt comedian. Read More

Spill some salt, throw it over your left shoulder. Step on a crack, break your mother’s back, Break a mirror, seven years of bad luck. Don’t walk under a ladder. Don’t cross paths with a black cat. Cross your fingers for good luck (or if you were telling a little lie, but didn’t want it… Read More

I first read the book when I was a teenager. It’s the only book I missed two meals to finish. I staggered out of my bedroom late in the afternoon after turning the last page. I’d been lost for what seemed like days in the lives of Scarlett, Ashley, Melanie and Rhett. My parents must… Read More

    Right, acquired tastes, my ar*e. You know what they’re really saying, don’t you? “This stuff is grim, but we can’t afford to throw it away.” So here’s three stories about how you, a literal child, was just too simple to appreciate. Olives. Tiny, wrinkled balls of sadness swimming in brine. Apparently, these were… Read More

He would hold the instrument behind his back in his left hand, the bow behind his back in the right, and play. Once he had your attention, he would proceed to lie down on the living room carpet and continue, with no loss of rhythm or resonance Read More

The Corpse in the Office  I grew up in the Bronx on a tree-lined street that bordered the beautifully designed and landscaped housing complex called Parkchester.  (See The Puppy in the Waiting Room,  Magnolia, The Story of a Garden, and Parkchester, Celebrate Me Home) There were seven or eight stores on our street,  a bar called… Read More

It is an auspicious day for a cremation There will be no tears today Tears would drag your spirit back to earth Your pallbearers wear earrings and black shirts Sporting logos of Harley-Davidson, Heavy Metal; On your wreath, a banner Advertises the Sheraton Nusa Dua The cremation tower, sunny white and yellow, Adorned with your… Read More